这两天我一直处于烦躁不安胸闷气短低血糖的状态，我不确定是不是因为马航失联事件。我当然不可能狂妄到去体察家属的复杂心情，我只是觉得这整件事——这么长时间完全失去联系没有半点信号，以及专家推断的最有可能的飞机高空解体——让我觉得，怎么说呢，crazy and unacceptable
以及一个星期前的昆明事件，骇人听闻的同时，有一篇写当事人和受害者的文章，我看了两三段就再也不能继续下去。
长吁一口气。
很多正能量的人会发言说，越是悲剧发生时，大家越是要好好的活着，生活下去。这是对的。只是，即使没有人提醒，大家也会好好的生活下去，除了当事人及其至亲外，其他人的人生不会受太大影响。昆明的事才过了一星期，已经没有什么人谈论，也许一周年的时候会有人再次提起，但它最终只会成为一次恐怖袭击案例而已。今天的失联，也会变成航空灾难史上的一个案例，当下次类似事件发生时被Geek们拿出来谈论，又或者还会变成小时候看过的世界X件神秘事件中的一章。反正最终，他们都会成为一个名词而已。
想到这里的时候，我并未觉得哀伤，也没想嘲讽什么。相反，我还蛮佩服我们人类的本性的，善于忘记，才能不被失败的阴影所束缚，才能进步，才能变成更好的人类。
最近读到的一段话（其实是做的翻译练习），虽然它是讲老人应当如何看待死亡的问题，却也让我的心灵意外的平静。一字一句的打上来，希望能超度一些灵魂，能再次平静一下我的心。
Some old people are oppressed by the fear of death. In the young there is a justification for this feeling. Young men who have reason to fear that they will be killed in battle may justifiably feel bitter in the thought that they have been cheated of the best things that life has to offer. But in an old man who has known human joys and sorrows, and has achieved whatever work it was in him to do, the fear of death is somewhat abject and ignoble. The best way to overcome it — so at least it seems to me — is to make your interests gradually wider and more impersonal, until bit by bit the walls of the ego recede, and your life becomes increasingly merged in the universal life. An individual human existence should be like a river — small at first, narrowly contained within its banks, and rushing passionately past boulders and over waterfalls. Gradually the river grows wider, the banks recede, the waters flow more quietly, and in the end, without any visible break, they become merged in the sea, and painlessly lose their individual being. The man who, in old age, can see his life in this way, will not suffer from the fear of death, since the thing he cares for will continue. And if, with the decay of vitality, weariness increases, the thought of rest will be not unwelcome. I should wish to die while still at work, knowing that others will carry on what I can no longer do, and content in the thought that what was possible has been done.(Bertrand Russell: Portraits from Memory)
有些老年人因为怕死而感到烦恼。青年人有这种感觉是情有可原的，有理由害怕自己会死在战场上的年轻人，想到自己被剥夺了生活所能给予的最美好的东西时，感到痛苦，这是可以理解的。可是老年人已经饱尝了人间的甘苦，一切能做的都做了，如果怕死，就有点儿可怜又可鄙。克服怕死的最好办法——至少在我看来是这样——就是逐渐使自己的兴趣更加广泛，逐渐摆脱个人狭小的圈子，直到自我的围墙一点一点地倒塌下来，自己的生活慢慢地和整个宇宙的生活融合在一起。个人的存在应该像一条河流，开始很小，被紧紧的夹在两岸中间，接着热情奔放的冲过巨石，飞下瀑布。然后河面渐渐变宽，两岸后撤，河水流得平缓起来，最后连绵不断的汇入大海，毫无痛苦的失去了自我的存在。上了年纪的人这样看待生命，就不会有惧怕死亡的心情了，因为自己关心的一切事物都会继续下去。再者，随着精力的衰退，老年人的疲惫感会增加，有长眠的愿望未尝不是一件好事。我希望工作到死为止，明白了有人会继续我的未竟事业，想到能做的事都做了，也就坦然了。